We commemorate the adoption of the Declaration of Independence on July 4, a national holiday, by celebrating our patriotism with barbeques, parades, family get-togethers, and fireworks. It is challenging, if possible at all, to celebrate our freedom if you feel trapped and not in control of your own life. You are not alone if you are isolated, afraid and depressed, your situation seems hopeless, things don’t ever seem to change, and you believe that you don’t deserve to be happy, anyway. Many abused women have some or all of these negative feelings and beliefs until after they get out of a toxic relationship. You will be better able to change them when you are not being abused anymore. You can take steps to change your situation and your outlook on life, even if they are small steps at first. Here’s where to start.

You may wonder whether or not you have a codependent relationship with your abuser or suffer from trauma bonding. It is important to understand the symptoms and treatments. Prolonged abuse is very corrosive to self-esteem and may result in chronic depression, physical illness due to unexpressed anger and resentment, hopelessness, and learned helplessness. Here are the signs to look out for, and how to start the healing and recovery process.

Domestic abuse comes in different forms and may include or escalate to physical abuse, but not always. All of them are damaging to your self-esteem and can cause trauma and depression. Name-calling, put downs, blaming, cruelty, hypercriticism, control, isolating you from friends or family members, financial abuse, discounting your needs and feelings, passive aggressive behavior, invading personal privacy, threats, and other forms of abuse are common. Abused women may also be subjected to gaslighting, a destabilizing form of psychological abuse used frequently by narcissists. Here’s what to look for and how to cope with this specific form of psychological abuse.

Many people, whether in an unhealthy relationship or during a difficult time in their lives, feel helpless, victimized, out of control, or incapable of making a difference in their situation. They may desperately want to alter their circumstances, but are stuck because they lack self-confidence or the tools they need to do it. They don’t know where the source of power is to bring about meaningful change in their lives. Here we share where the real power lies, and how you can start accessing that power to create real change in your life. 

You will need to have a personal financial statement, or balance sheet of all of your known assets and liabilities, for all of your divorce professionals. So we’ve created an interactive personal financial statement worksheet, to help you collect all of your assets and gain a strong sense of your financial standing.

My most poignant life lessons did not come through study or careful observation. Rather, I learned so much more about myself when I failed to use sound judgment and suffered from my own bad decisions. At those times, I didn’t trust my own intuition or the signals of distress that my body was giving me. My discernment was clouded by misplaced loyalty and by clinging rigidly to outmoded values that did not serve me well. I wasn’t open to the examination of my entire belief system until a contentious divorce rocked my world. Here is my personal story behind why I write.

Addictions are a form of self-medication through a compulsive coping mechanism to deal with a life that has become unbearable and out of control. Whether it is drugs, alcohol, food, shopping, gambling, sex, work, or even exercise, any activity that is carried to extremes is a way to avoid dealing with the personal pain of trauma, problems, relationships, or personal flaws that appear to be too difficult to face head on. Here are ways in which forgiveness - of yourself and others - can help you recover and heal.

Holidays can be a depressing and stressful time of year due to unrealistic expectations, too many or too few commitments, difficult family relationships, or money troubles. Domestic abuse can intensify during these occasions because of increased stress or a reduction in inhibitions as a result of excessive drinking or drug abuse.  Here are a few strategies to help you manage - and enjoy - this Thanksgiving holiday.

As many abusers tend to escalate their aggression and threats once they become aware that they have lost control of their victim with a divorce filing, it is imperative that you take appropriate steps to avoid conflict and reduce the level of stress and fear you are experiencing.

If you do have time to prepare before you leave, it is essential to take appropriate steps so that you have the best possible outcome. Here are the most critical steps to take.

Labor Day is a celebrated American holiday that gives credit for our country’s high standard of living, strong work ethic, ingenuity, and productivity. We pay tribute on this day to our ideals of free enterprise, democracy, and fair protections in the workplace. As an abused woman or spouse, these ideals and this tribute are not always present in the home. Here are critical steps to take them back.